Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Random thoughts

So I am a nervous wreck.  This surgery is consuming my every thought.  I have to FOCUS to accomplish daily tasks like helping with homework, making meals, etc.  Anytime I have any downtime my thoughts go to my surgery and everything that goes with it. 

I have done all of the research possible...short of watching an actual surgery on you tube, I really feel like I could not be any more prepared.  I have read blogs on how tough some peoples recoveries are, seemed some horrendous pictures of swelling and some honestly look like they have been beaten by a bat.

On the other hand, some people are braced (haha) for the worst and their recoveries are much better than anticipated.

I spend tons of time wondering what side of the spectrum my recovery will fall on. 

I have spent so much time anticipating the surgery that now that it is on my doorstep it is amazing that I feel shocked that it is finally happening.

Anytime I let myself really think about what is happening I find myself short of breath and the anxiety is overwhelming. 

Apparently this is common because I have been prescribed some xanax to take before bed to help me sleep.  Thank the lord because I was waking up every hour before said anxiety pill and now I am sleeping fitfully which is important before ungoing any major surgery.

Again, I will post pics post surgery as soon as I realize that I am not going to find my camera charger and go out and buy a new one.

Love to all and thanks for all of your well wishes.


  1. Hi Mandy! I can imagine how you feel! I do wish it was me having my surgery Monday though. I just want to get over the hump. I know that when I am days away I will be as anxious as you. That is completely normal though. I have only had very minor surgeries before but have practically needed to be strapped down due to my anxiety over it all! Ha ha.

    You will be soooo happy next week. Just one week from today... When the surgery is over, the worst is over, and you are feeling better again. Time flies. Don't be worried about the surgery itself. You know you have a good doctor and you have done your homework. You know all that though. The Xanax does help though!! Hee hee.

    I will DEFINITELY be thinking of you on Monday and sending good thoughts and prayers your way! :-)

  2. Thanks bracefaced for your positive words! They really help and are so very appreciated!